By Rose Chu, Little Canada
Thursday, March 13, 2014. Early in the week, I had travelled to Alabama to help bring my mom, Ruby, and my stepdad back to Minnesota for a visit. I had arranged for some follow up appointments at the Mayo Clinic and with Dr. Zhouling Ren, our traditional Chinese medicine doctor. Ren has become “family.” She had previously collaborated with the amazing doctors at Mayo to care for Ruby while Ruby went through intensive chemotherapy and radiation for her second bout with cancer in 2004. Without a doubt, if not for Dr. Ren’s herbal prescription for Ruby, Ruby couldn’t have survived the toxicity of the chemotherapy and radiation.
We had completed three days of doctor appointments. Since the fall of 2009, these appointments were now less about her cancer and more about managing Ruby’s vascular dementia. Finally, my mom and my stepdad could take a break and rest before more appointments on Friday and the following week. I remember spending some time with Ruby in the morning before heading to work after being away for a few days. Whenever I was around, Ruby was eager for me to take her places. She might have lost a lot of her cognitive abilities, but she never lost her love for shopping!
Although she could no longer handle money on her own, she never lost her sense of finding a great deal! It was no different this day when I got home from work. We went to the closest church-run thrift store, one that we have visited many times in her previous stays in Minnesota. While I was paying for a blouse she picked out, she was curiously looking through some books on a table close by. She picked out one and handed to me to buy. It was a thin book with pictures and large words titled “I Love to go to Church”. That evening after dinner and after I bathed her, on her own she moved to the living room couch in her pajamas, picked up the book and started reading! Well, “reading” in whatever capacity she had left, especially with her limited English proficiency. It was clear she was engaged with this book she proudly chose for 15 cents! She looked so comfortable, so content, so happy.
There were many such precious moments during her 12-day stay in Minnesota, albeit much shorter than expected this time around. Ruby didn’t want to leave. I told her I would come visit her in Alabama soon and bring her back again in May for perhaps a much longer stay.
Some unfortunate turn of events ensued. Ruby got moved to Virginia. I visited her in August and September. I saw her take her last breath on October 12. Rest in peace, my dear mother. I can feel your presence in the house that you loved. You are with me, always.
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