2018 #MinneAsianStories: Hello, Neighbor

Indecipherable Swarm of Asians

Cori Lin, Minneapolis

When I was growing up in the suburbs of Chicago, I didn’t go to Asian gatherings. I went to family gatherings and church gatherings that were comprised of all Asians, but we weren’t there because we were Asian. We were there because we loved Jesus, or just because we were related. We rarely talked about Asianness, Japaneseness, or Race. We just were. Beyond church and family, I would actively avoid Asian spaces or groups at school, preferring to hang out with the nerdy white kids. I was constantly afraid of being erased in the minds of my white peers, blending into an indecipherable swarm of Asians, being seen as a stereotype rather than an individual.

Moving to Minnesota, learning and growing, I’ve started to love myself and my Asianness more fully. I struggled finding belonging in the mostly white non-profit sector of MN, and I found acknowledgement, understanding, and commiserating with other Asians, who are often looking around the room desperately trying to find a face that looks like theirs. While I rarely meet fellow Japanese or Taiwanese Americans, the Asian community has been unabashedly welcoming. I think they feel similar waves of frustration and insecurity emanating off me. Becoming friends with Minnesota Asians from many backgrounds, I started to see similarities in our horror stories (re: experiences of racism and prejudice) and perspectives. I recognized some of my scars in theirs, and was even given names for them (microaggressions, whitewashing, tokenism). Back home in the suburbs of Chicago there are many more Asians that are similar to me, but here in Minneapolis I found connection.

Check out the rest of #MinneAsianStories.