“Beyond DNA: How My Identity Was Validated”

Rebecca Johnson

Filipino | Richfield, MN | she/her/hers | Private Sector

Two Christmases ago, I decided to take an AncestryDNA test. I knew what the results were going to be, yet something inside me needed to see them on paper; maybe then I wouldn’t feel like an imposter when telling others that I am Filipino.

My skin is brown. Yet everything I’d known growing up was white: my family, my friends, my teachers. Even every single one of my crushes.

I grew up in Barnesville, MN – a rural farming community. I lived with my mom and my younger (White) brother. Most people assumed I was adopted, and I was fine with that because the alternative was to tell the truth. Which was that my dad was a singer in a band called ‘Shades of Brown’ and met my mom at a bar during one of their shows. She fell in love. He left.

Beyond my daddy issues, being a brown girl in Barnesville had painful moments. The name-calling, the assumptions about where I came from, the fist fights my brother would get into trying to defend me against cruel words – all of it shaped me into the sensitive, unsure person I am today.

As for the AncestryDNA results: half Filipino. No surprise there. Do these percentages make me feel like a more complete person? No. Do they make up for the fact that my father left when I was a baby? No. Do I feel less like an imposter – kind of, but not because of the DNA test.

I recently attended a Coalition of Asian American Leaders (CAAL) luncheon. I heard stories of struggle and success. I learned that being Asian isn’t hinged on any one thing. I can be Filipino and not know any of my relatives in the Philippines. I can be Filipino and not know how to cook lumpia. I can be Filipino and Irish and come from a small farming town. CAAL has taught me that my identity is valid simply because I am me, and my story is my own.

#MinneAsianStories Series