The Fabric Fields

Christopher Xiong

Brooklyn Park, Minnesota | Hmong

The picture is of me in Hmong clothes surrounded in a field of wheat, to me it describes growing up as a first generation Hmong-American, I was stuck between two worlds, one world taught me that I have to be ‘Americanized’ adapting the American ways, but there’s this other world that reminds me to keep my roots and identity as a Hmong descent.

There was a time when I didn’t appreciate who I was. When I was in elementary school I’d get asked by a lot of other kids about who my people were. I replied “Hmong” and most of them would reply back “is that another word for Chinese?” From kindergarten to 4th grade, I didn’t want to mention or say much about my culture and heritage because I felt like my story wasn’t as interesting as the other kids who would share about their ancestry being from Ireland, Germany, Austria etc. But being the only Asian kid of Hmong descent really made me an outcast of not belonging anywhere.

I would come home after school and question my father of “why aren’t our people as interesting as others?” He would give me his confused glare and talk with me about the history of the Hmong and why we are here in the United States, the struggle of our people through many centuries and wars to be where we’re at. I started to ask more questions. The more I heard, the more I asked.

The Vietnam War was taught to us in elementary but it was only focused on Vietnam and a little on Cambodia but not Laos. When Junior High came around and we started to learn about more about the Vietnam War, there was a section about the war in Laos and our teacher started to talk about the Hmong’s involvement that was similar to what my father spoke of when he told me about the war. I started to listen more at family gatherings as the elders would gather around, I would ask my dad to buy a lot of Hmong history documentaries for me to watch and books to read.

As I grew older, Hmong history started to become more interesting, as more stories are being revealed by our elders. Minnesota is a state that appreciates the sacrifices of our veterans and people. I pursued my education at the University of Minnesota – Twin Cities in both Political Science and History, but History was the major I first declared due to my love for stories that have been shared or has yet to be discovered. Like my Hmong clothes, every day the sewing of the fabric becomes more brighter and more artistic with stories of my life and like the wheat field I will always search for more of the stories that have yet to be discovered.

Hmong may not have a country, but what’s unique is that a place will never describe my people, but it’ll be my people that defines the place they call “Home.” Minnesota will always be home.

#MinneAsianStories Series